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Author: Oriana

Borderline Rage

Dear Anger, You lured me in with your cunning —seduced You felt so good running through my veins —addicting The vibration in my body overtakes me —blinded You gave me something I never had —power Nothing matters when you’re with me —deception As your presence leaves my body, I fall —guilt You leave a bitter taste in my mouth —regret Want to dance again? —repeat — Oriana Allen – Image by Jan Koprîva at...

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Book Excerpt: Chapter 3

Identity Integration . . . “She was like the Moon––Part of her was always hidden” -Dia Reeves      After living many years in frustration and confusion––constantly wondering why I seemed so different from others.  I started exploring the answers to these questions: Why were making decisions so hard?Why did being honest or vulnerable feel painstaking and impossible? Why did I lack self control over my emotions? Why did I keep making the same mistakes, over and over? Why couldn’t I stop destructive behaviour’s when I wanted to?Why did I obsess over others, wishing I could be as good as someone else? Why did...

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Battling the “I’m Not Good Enough” Syndrome

You may wonder, what is this not good enough epidemic I keep hearing about?  It is something that I discovered I had a few years ago. In more recent times, I have heard others share similar experiences to my own––expressing the symptoms and life outcomes that reflected that we in fact were suffering from the same illness, which I call: The not good enough Syndrome.   What is tricky about this “syndrome”, is that many people are not even aware they have it! This is the invisible work of inner core beliefs at play.  These beliefs operate within us,...

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Redefining Borderline Personality Disorder from the DSM Criteria

Disclaimer: This is long and emotionally intensive as it is a representation of my thought process as someone who is borderline. I promise an encouraging ending.   It has taken me 23 years to effectively communicate my emotions. I felt trapped by the stigma and damning diagnostic criteria. This is my reflection on each “identifying factor” that I’ve experienced and what they mean to me. There are aspects not touched upon in the very criteria that is intended to define me, and others like me. I took the liberty of elaborating on what I feel are consequential identifying factors that I...

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An Overview of Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD)

What Is BPD??? Borderline personality Disorder (BPD), is a serious mental illness that centres on an inability to manage emotions effectively. There is a long-term pattern of abnormal behaviour characterized by: Unstable relationships with other people Unstable sense of self Unstable emotions Everyone can most likely recognize some of the BPD traits to varying degree. It is how many of the traits you have and to what degree that the traits effect your daily life, that qualifies you for a diagnosis of Borderline Personality Disorder. The term ‘borderline’ refers to the now outdated but once widely accepted notion that...

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